Let’s talk about that self-love..

Self-Love

We are entering a very commercialized week that is all about love, true love, finding love, and having that person complete you. But what if you are your greatest true love and have been all along? Loving yourself, respecting yourself, and caring for yourself in a society that loves to point out each other’s flaws is a bold choice. Choosing to show yourself kindness and set boundaries—whether you have a partner or not—is a bold choice. I always think of it this way: my relationship with myself, and your relationship with yourself, is the longest relationship you will ever have. How is it?

If it isn’t the greatest right now, that’s okay. Here are some suggestions on ways you can improve it. Consider the way you speak to yourself: is it kind? Is it helpful? Is it constructive feedback? If not, there may be some room for improvement. If you are used to speaking to yourself in a negative fashion, try saying one nice thing to yourself a day to start. Or, if that feels too overwhelming, shift to saying something neutral instead. For example: “I did such a terrible job, I am such a loser” could be shifted to “That was a great first attempt. I have room to improve, but I will learn from this experience.” A simple shift like this can make such a difference. The first comment feels very negative and even mean-spirited, while the second, more neutral comment sounds hopeful and leaves room to grow.

Another way you can show yourself love during this season of love is by caring for your needs. So many of us are givers, helpers, and supporters. While that is a truly wonderful thing, how would our lives change or improve if we took the time to give ourselves the same time, care, and attention? I would guess it would improve our lives drastically, cut down on stress, and allow us even more room to grow and support others. Are you eating regularly, staying hydrated, moving your body? These are basic examples, but in the same way we encourage others to do things regularly to support themselves, let’s make sure we are doing the same for ourselves.

Boundaries are another way we can show ourselves love each and every day. How are your boundaries with yourself and others? Remember, you get to create the boundaries, but you also must enforce them. If your boundaries are constantly being breached, that is a great opportunity for self-reflection and to give yourself additional support. Boundaries are created for ourselves and others. They help foster healthy relationships and prevent burnout. If the word "boundary" sounds scary to you, that’s okay—start when you feel ready and start small. A simple “No, thank you” or “Maybe next time” can go a long way when it comes to boundaries.

If you have a partner this Valentine’s season, that’s wonderful! But please know, if you don’t, you can still show extra love and support to yourself. You can spend time with friends, or even buy yourself chocolates or flowers if it’s in the budget. If not, that’s okay too—you can cook yourself your favorite meal or watch a beloved movie. Feel free to get creative and have fun! There are lots of ways to celebrate your life and love during this time, and it doesn’t have to look the same as others.

I hope that after reading this, you have some ideas to increase your self-love, care for yourself, and move forward in this New Year. Remember, self-love doesn’t have to be selfish, but it is very personal. Each of us can only give away what we possess, so the more love and care you give to yourself, the more you have to give to others. This week is all about love, but I hope after reading this, you continue to show yourself the love and support you are so worthy of all year long.

Remember to tell yourself as well!

How do you practice self-love in your daily life? Any personal rituals or habits that help you stay connected to yourself?We would love to hear them!